Jimmy, a priest and a rabbi were talking one day
and during the course of the conversation, Jimmy casually asks the rabbi,
"I know that in your religion, you're not supposed to eat pork... but have
you really never even tasted it?" The rabbi responded, "I must tell
you the truth. Yes, I have, on the odd occasion." Jimmy then asks the
priest, "I know that in your religion, you're supposed to be celibate,
but..." The priest interjected, "Yes, I know what you are going to
ask, and yes, I have succumbed to temptation once or twice." The rabbi
then asks the priest, "Better than pork, isn't it?"
A man walked into the ladies department of a
Macy's, and walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, "I'd like
to buy a bra for my wife" What type of bra?" asked the clerk.
"Type?" inquires the man. "There is more than one type?"
"Look around," said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in
every shape, size, color and material. "Actually, even with all of this
variety, there are really only three types of bras," replied the
salesclerk. Confused, the man asked what the types were. The saleslady replied
"The Catholic type, the, Salvation Army type, and the Baptist type. Which
one do you need?" Still confused the man asked, "What is the difference
between them?" The lady responded, "It is all really quite simple.
The Catholic type supports the masses, the Salvation Army type lifts up the
fallen, and the Baptist type makes mountains out of mole hills.
A nun, badly needing to use the restroom, walked
into a local Hooters. The place was hopping with music and loud conversation
and every once in a while the lights would turn off.
Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers. However, when the revelers saw the nun, the room went dead silent.
She walked up to the bartender, and asked, "May I please use the restroom?
The bartender replied, "OK, but I should warn you that there is a statue of a naked man in there wearing only a fig leaf."
"Well, in that case I'll just look the other way," said the nun.
So, the bartender showed the nun to the back of the restaurant, and she preceded to the restroom. After a few minutes, she came back out, and the whole place stopped just long enough to give the nun a loud round of applause.
She went to the bartender and said, "Sir, I don't understand! Why did they applaud for me just because I went to the restroom?"
"Well, now they know you're one of us," said the bartender, "Would you like a drink?"
"But, I still don't understand," said the puzzled nun.
"You see," laughed the bartender, "every time the fig leaf on the statue is lifted up, the lights go out. Now, how about that drink?"
Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers. However, when the revelers saw the nun, the room went dead silent.
She walked up to the bartender, and asked, "May I please use the restroom?
The bartender replied, "OK, but I should warn you that there is a statue of a naked man in there wearing only a fig leaf."
"Well, in that case I'll just look the other way," said the nun.
So, the bartender showed the nun to the back of the restaurant, and she preceded to the restroom. After a few minutes, she came back out, and the whole place stopped just long enough to give the nun a loud round of applause.
She went to the bartender and said, "Sir, I don't understand! Why did they applaud for me just because I went to the restroom?"
"Well, now they know you're one of us," said the bartender, "Would you like a drink?"
"But, I still don't understand," said the puzzled nun.
"You see," laughed the bartender, "every time the fig leaf on the statue is lifted up, the lights go out. Now, how about that drink?"
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